Desperate Cries for Help Your Faithful Correspondent in the News

Crack Associated Press reporters Jay Root (most recently of the might-as-well-be-defunct Fort Worth Star-Telegram) and April Castro (most recently in the Z-Tejas bar) co-write an election preview piece on the legislative outlook in which I am included, presumably because it’s kind of cool how I gratuitously insult George W. Bush.

Austin America-Statesman Washington Bureau reporter Jason Embry writes an analysis piece on the Congressional district 10 race, in which I somehow fail to gratuitously insult George W. Bush.

Sneak Preview: applicable if you’re in the Austin area on Election night, I’ll be part of the News 8 coverage team all night after the polls close in the central time zone at 7 pm. I’ll be joined by, among others, Republican Hans Klingler, who is assigned to disagree with everything I say. Klingler and I have been hand-picked for this prestigious assignment mainly because we’re old enough to seem slightly credible to the 8-10 year old target market, yet we’re young enough to still have hair.

As you may already be aware, Hans is an underhanded double-dealing low-down mean spirited sniveling Republican. Since he is my good friend, I will tolerate absolutely no insults whatsoever of Hans on this website. Letters From Texas Worldwide Headquarters has strict policies against such things.



6 Responses to Desperate Cries for Help Your Faithful Correspondent in the News

  1. hans klingler October 27, 2008 at 2:33 pm #

    To my friends on the other side of the aisle,

    With 8 days left before this historic election, why are you people reading anything else other than “Letters From Texas”? Harold Cook’s political insight and dry comedic wit coupled with a blog site which is not subject to copyright infringement charges by the estate of Ray Kroc should endear the left to him for quite awhile. I look forward to doing my best Tony Blankely with him next Tuesday. Underhanded yes…sniveling quite possibly…but double dealing?

    Peace and respect,

    Hans the Republican

  2. FUBAR October 27, 2008 at 2:37 pm #

    I’m not even quite sure what “sniveling” means, but it sure sounds bad.

  3. Mean Rachel October 27, 2008 at 3:47 pm #


    Indeed we are endeared.
    I just hope Fubar remembers to bring some Kleenex for you and your Republican cronies.

    Rachel the Winner

  4. Credentials October 27, 2008 at 5:00 pm #

    ILMS Hans Klingler!!

    But that’s off the record. As a member of the Liberal Elite Media (otherwise known as LEMmings) I’m not supposed to admit that. They’re so totally going to kick me out of the club.

  5. Anonymous October 27, 2008 at 8:19 pm #

    Wasn’t Hans Klingler a regular on “Hogan’s Heroes”?

  6. Anonymous October 27, 2008 at 8:36 pm #

    Yes, he was on an earlier generation/s “Heroes.”
    My favorite on that show was Schultz, although he always said, “I know Nossing.” I never could figure out who Nossing was.

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