Last week’s poll question was “McCain’s campaign is sinking like a rock. What could he still do to win?”
Coming in with a hefty 42 percent was “Get every American in battleground states snot-slinging drunk before voting.” I’m actually not sure that would work, since all the mean drunks would probably just even more mad at the last eight years of Republican rule. Meanwhile, the…um…non-mean drunks would all hook up and get a room, thus forgetting to vote at all.
In second place with 30 percent was “Dump Palin and replace her with Jesus.” That actually might work, since the elimination of the costs associated with Palin’s wardrobe alone could put significantly more NcCain TV spots up in Florida.
In third with 18 percent was “Make all future appearances with the Steve Martin fake arrow through his head.” I have no idea where that came from. But it couldn’t hurt.
In last place with 15 percent was “Show up with bin Laden in chains at the next ‘Obama is the Anti-Christ’ rally.” I guess I shouldn’t have included the “anti-Christ rally” part, since that’s what they’ve been doing already and it hasn’t helped. But neither has Joe the Plumber. Or John The Senator. Or Sarah The SNL.
There won’t be a poll this week. Stand by for a special announcement on top of the right hand sidebar!