In case you missed it...

Monday, June 22, 2009

PETA is just as crazy as you think they are

When I wrote the headline on this previous post, it was just a joke - neither PETA nor FoxNews had yet jumped on Obama for killing a fly. Even the pro-lifers had a moment of sanity, proving once again that they really don't mean it when they say "all life is sacred."

Then, PETA did indeed jump Obama. For swatting a fly. Seriously? You people are seriously eff'ed up.

I herein join with those who have courageously come before me to proclaim that "PETA" should stand for "People Eating Tasty Animals."

I herein lock arms with those who have courageously come before me to declare that if God had intended people to not eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of meat.

And, I herein express my disappointment with FoxNews and the pro-lifers for failing to weigh in on this Obama fly-killing situation in the wacked-out way I was counting on. That I know of. So far.

Meanwhile, that lobster that I ordered on my trip to Boston last weekend? He was delicious. The fact that I sent him to his eternal paradise in crustacean heaven early is my gift to animal lovers everywhere. He was served with drawn butter, which was undoubtedly obtained by the cruel manipulation of a very nice cow, which had probably befriended a cute little boy on a pristine farm somewhere in New England. They even threw in a few clams, one of which may have inexplicably had the I.Q. of Albert Einstein, and would have solved the world's problems had he been allowed to survive. Too damn bad. It was all very yummy.

Feel free to weigh in on the comments section regarding your reason why you think PETA is nuts.

9 comments so far:

Anonymous June 22, 2009 12:29 PM  

they didnt comment until someone called them and asked for comment dumbass

FUBAR June 22, 2009 1:14 PM  

oh, ok, got it. This has been a learning experience for me. Now I know that it's ok to be an idiot, as long as I don't prove myself to be one before somebody asks. Thank you for educating me! I would have replied earlier, but I was delayed by this delicious cheeseburger I just ate.

Anonymous June 22, 2009 4:04 PM  

you, like all of the other trust puppets running dem politics in texas, are entirely too conservative for my taste.

FUBAR June 22, 2009 4:12 PM  

Anonymous (if indeed that is your real name): Thanks for your comment. I realize that it is truly a huge set-back for Democratic politics in Texas that I, an actual meat-eater, am so out of touch with the average PETA-loving Texas voter.

Anonymous June 22, 2009 4:28 PM  

you may not be out of touch with the average Texas voter, you are just out of touch with the facts...

FUBAR June 22, 2009 4:34 PM  

Well for that, I would simply refer you to the last sentence in this website's disclaimer. Which, ironically, also has an animal protection clause in it.

Anonymous June 22, 2009 4:50 PM  

its just typical... too many of those working in dem politics spend too much time making fun of the actual liberals by calling them crazy. they are no better than conservatives at that point. i just want to ask the anti-union, hummer driving, gun owning, democrats that are working in dem politics, why? sure, these are all wedge issues. but dont make fun of your fellow democrats for what they believe in. and if you do, you aren't the kind of person i want fighting the good fight in Austin.

FUBAR June 22, 2009 5:01 PM  

I made fun of neither liberals or Democrats. I made fun of PETA. And, oh yeah, I'm pro-union and anti-hummer. Good luck on your goal of fewer people fighting the good fight in Austin though, that's a winning strategy. Have yourself a great day. :)

Anonymous June 22, 2009 6:55 PM  

not fewer :) just liberal... like... at all. please. anyone that might actually represent me as a very liberal democrat. thanks for playing with me today. you have made me laugh.

Post a Comment

© 2008-2010 Harold Cook. All rights reserved. No content may be reproduced without prior written permission. Views expressed herein are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of clients, employers, or other sane human beings. This offer is void where prohibited. Substantial penalty for early withdrawal. Political satire contained herein is subject to change without notice. Your mileage may vary. All models are over the age of 18. Keep away from open flames. No animals were harmed in the making of this website. If this website is ingested, do not induce vomiting; if symptoms persist, consult your physician. If content of this website offends you, by all means extract the corncob from your ass and lighten up. Comment on this.


Log In/Out


Blogger Template Spain courtesy of Ourblogtemplates.com. Header artwork courtesy of Doug Zabel.

Back to TOP