Archive | January, 2010

Headline of the week, so far

Odd that they even bothered to study this. It seems pretty obvious to me.

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Need to get away?

It’s been a bad few weeks for Hutchison on the Republican side, and Shami on the Democratic side. They’re way behind in the polls, and can’t budge an inch of opposing candidates’ supporter. Even Perry looks a little stressed, what with Medina coming up in the polls and threatening to force an embarrassing run-off.

Frankly people, you could each use a vacation. Here’s one suggestion.

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A quick update on Austin’s “Clean Cities” project

You’re doin’ a heck-of-a-job, Brownie!

[photo courtesy of Reagan Hackleman]

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A note from Rahm Emanuel


FROM:  Rahm Emanuel

TO:  White House Message Team

SUBJECT: Tonight’s State-of-the-Union Address

Team, sorry if I seem a bit disjointed in this memo, but some glitch in the White House email system means that one wrong keystroke on my end, and instead of this going to you, it will end up on Harold Cook’s stupid blog down in that God-forsaken Texas. The I.T. people are looking into it, and the glitch should soon be solved.

That aside, I have absolutely no reason to believe that the President’s speech tonight won’t be stellar. He intends to re-connect with the middle class. He’ll talk a lot about jobs and the economy, and he’ll remind voters why they supported us in the first place.

But just in case the speech falls flat, here are some things to remember, as you talk to reporters.

First, people need to know that if tonight’s speech falls flat, it’s no reflection on the White House or the Democratic majority in Congress. Rather, it’s Martha Coakley’s fault. The details of that will be covered later, but trust me – it’s because of something she did.

Second, the American public needs to be reminded that if they don’t like the President’s state-of-the-union speech tonight, it’s no surprise. Because, after all, President Obama inherited a really crappy state-of-the-union speech from George Bush. People should understand that it’s just going to take some time to edit out the failed state-of-the-union speeches from the previous administration, and they should be reminded that the state-of-the-union speech is already much better than it was just one year ago when we took office.

But again, I believe these contingency message components will be completely unnecessary, because I know that President Obama will deliver a speech tonight which will make all the Blue Dogs in Congress so proud they’ll want to wag their tails and lick their privates. I hope they mention how much they liked the speech, as they go to the bar later to belt down a few with their favorite insurance company and defense contractor lobbyists.

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Quote of the Day

The U.S. Supreme Court ruling last week, which apparently makes it ok for corporations to put big money into elections, is tied up in the longstanding legal notion of corporate personhood. This means that, for purposes of legal convenience, the law treats a corporation as if it was an actual person instead of a group of hundreds, or thousands, of investors, officers, employees, and customers. This legal principle allows, among other things, corporations to be charged with crimes, be sued in court, or to sue others in court, as if it was a single legal entity.

Now comes Ezra Klein, writing in the Washington Post, who immediately gets to the heart of the matter:

“If corporations are persons, they are — if they behave as Milton Friedman wanted them to — persons with mental and emotional impairments so severe that any decent judge would feel entirely justified in declaring them incompetent.”

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More stunning celebrity sightings in the headlines

On the heels of yesterday’s report that Elvis Presley has been found alive in his mother’s closet, now comes this report that Laurel and Hardy have been arrested on drug charges.

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Great news from Alabama

The King is alive

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It’s 1,632 miles between Massachusetts and Texas

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yada yada yada. The Chicken Little “sky is falling” crowd will go into overdrive today, as Republicans will suddenly spin that as goes Massachusetts, so goes Texas. Wow, that’s a new one. Texas and Massachusetts don’t have anything in common except they both have people living in them who breathe air, both have a coastline, and both share an “e” and an “a” in their names.

First: remember how unpopular George W. Bush was, until about 12 minutes before he defeated Kerry? Remember how popular his father was, only months before Bill Clinton defeated him? Voters always present a moving target. They’ll keep moving until they stop moving in November, when the statewide and legislative elections that matter happen. So just because the Republicans won one on the other end of the country, let’s try our best to avoid calling all the Texas elections before a single voter has spoken, or at least before both political parties have their nominees, mmm-kay?

Second: great, voters are not happy with incumbents. That’s a news flash, so hold the presses. But last time I looked, the Republicans were in charge of everything in Texas. So if there’s something about the way Texas is being governed that voters don’t like, the folks to see about that are all hanging out over at Republican Headquarters.

I’m certainly not making a claim that the loss in Massachusetts is good news for Democrats. It’s not. But those who try to read too much into it for the purpose of somehow divining likely Texas election results, 10 months before the election, are certainly stretching.

But what the hell, you want “sky is falling?” I got your “sky is falling” right here. Nothing says “sky is falling” like yet another remix of this gem:

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Letters From Texas pop quiz

So…Utah state senator and Republican Majority Leader Sheldon Killpack has apparently resigned after getting arrested recently.

He has advocated for stronger drunk driving laws while in the state senate.

His father was killed by a drunk driver.

His religion frowns on alcohol use.

Let’s just see if you can guess what he was arrested for. No peeking.

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I hate to say “I told you so,” but…

…I told you so.

Who’s keeping track? Isn’t this like KBH resignation plan number 12?

UPDATE: word on the street is that this El Paso Fox affliate messed up, and will run a correction on tonight’s news cast. In other words, Hutchison isn’t going to admit that she’s not resigning after the primary until after the primary.

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Headline of the week – and it’s only Tuesday

I’m guessing the Washington Post was lying in wait for this situation to happen.

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Re-writing history, one lie at a time

About six weeks ago, George W. Bush’s spokesbot Dana Perino claimed in a FoxNews interview that there had never been a terrorist attack on American soil while Bush was the President. I thought at the time it must have been a massive case of the stupidicitis, in which she simply misspoke.

Now comes “Mr. 9-11” Rudy Guliani, who claimed the exact same thing last Friday on Good Morning America:

In political messaging, one person misspeaking is a mistake. Two misspeaking is a concerted coordinated trend, and thinking, patriotic Americans should call them on their lies every time they attempt them. Those who seek to re-write this history only serve to so utterly mask the roots of our life-threatening challenges that they themselves put Americans at further grave risk.

And what of the so-called “reporters” interviewing these liars? Best I can tell from the video clips, neither Perino’s or Guliani’s false claims were at all challenged by their interviewers. Of course, Perino’s interview was on FoxNews, which is to political news coverage what pro wrestling is to sports – it’s not real, they just want you to think it is.

Republicans, get it through your thick skulls: no matter how anxious you are for President Obama to fail, 9-11 happened, with Bush and your beloved Dick Cheney at the helm. And what about those anthrax attacks? Did Bush ever get to the bottom of that? Nope. But whether they originated from a foreign or domestic enemy, they too were terrorist attacks, which is what the Bush administration called them at the time, on American soil during Bush’s tenure.

And, by the way, just in case the lies spread to other fronts, here are some other things that actually did happen during the Bush administration, much to the inconvenience of Republican history re-writers everywhere.

— New Orleans was partially destroyed, and FEMA’s response under Bush made more people die.

–America went to war under false pretenses, while the Bush White House implied repeatedly that Iraq had something to do with the 9-11 attack, and people died.

–The White House, under Bush, turned a budget deficit Bill Clinton erased into an ocean of red ink.

–America, under Bush, failed to capture Osama bin Laden, “dead or alive.”

–The economy, under Bush, completely tanked

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Finally, the moment we’ve all been waiting for

A leading Republican consultant on the Chris Matthews show explains everything Republicans have done for America over the last 20 years.

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Dear Republican state senate candidates:

Frustrated about Federal spending? We don’t blame you a bit. We feel your pain, although we’re a bit puzzled as to why none of this bothered you back when Bush was squandering billions and building back up huge deficits which had earlier been erased by a Democratic administration by the time Bush took office.

That inconvenient detail aside, however, you might think twice next time, before you decide to vent your frustrations by tweeting racist crap about the President.

This helpful hint has been brought to you by the Letters From Texas Worldwide H.Q., Diversity Training Department.

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Well DUH.

I wouldn’t want a cell tower anywhere near mianus either!

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