Honestly, one of the few things Texas politics has had going for it in recent years is the laughs.
Which is why it totally disturbs me when there are clear signs that we are falling behind. Our home-grown wackjobs are increasingly not up to par these days.
Which is why I want you to meet Mark “Coonrippy” Brown. He’s running for governor of Tennessee (as a Republican, of course). He, like so many other Republicans, is concerned about our God-given Constitutional right to keep Rebekah, his pet raccoon. Apparently the Tennessee Wildlife Resources Agency took Rebekah away after she…um…did what raccoons do – attacked the chickens at the neighborhood high school. So he’s running for governor to right this wrong. They will pry his pet raccoon from his cold dead fingers.
No word yet on how ol’ Coonrippy plans to blame this on Obama, but I’m totally looking forward to it. There are even signs that Coonrippy’s catching on, since the morning The Daily Caller endorsed him.
If you’re not entertained yet, you’re almost dead to me, but I’ll give you one more chance: Coonrippy also makes videos. Here’s one of him during one of his favorite activities – showering with Rebekah The Chicken-killing Raccoon:
Texas politicos: tighten up your act, before it’s too late!