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Inquiring legislative minds want to know…

Which two Senators called Leticia Van de Putte “Babydoll?” And were these two separate incidents, or was it a group thing?

Who’s been calling Lois Kolkhorst “Sweetie?”

What’s the untold story on Judith Zaffirini’s hem line and stiletto heels?

Who tried to get a little too affectionate with Florence Shapiro?

And most of all, who the hell is “cutie patootie” and why weren’t Wendy Davis and Joan Huffman in this story??

Tune in next week, for our next episode of Texas Legislature: Like High School, But With Lots More Money.

UPDATE: As a service to you, the crap-reading public, feel free to click on either of the following buttons, print onto adhesive label paper, and wear in the Capitol today.

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Unsubstantiated Rumors Of The Day

Folks inside the Capitol and out began grumbling in earnest yesterday afternoon about the increasing rotting stench of dead bills in the House. Here it is Tuesday morning, and they’ll start 4 pages from the end of last Saturday’s calendar. The House worked Saturday for a while, but then unexpectedly adjourned early because of a rumored very important conflict with the Speaker’s schedule. The House again adjourned early yesterday, to the surprise of the 149 members whose names don’t start with a “J” and end with an “oe Straus.”

Meanwhile, the tongues of those not whining about the increasingly-apparent deadness of deader than dead bills were contemplating that little DPS oopsie. Inquiring minds want to know the deets!

Do you have an unsubstantiated rumor? Leave it in the comments section. We’re not that picky about accuracy. Come on – you know you wanna.

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